Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Funnies

I keep meaning to write some pretty funny things that have happened while pregnant to share with our sweet girl someday. Here are some favorites:

J: (Comment he made after reading a book our doula suggested). We need to make sure we have a nipple brush during labor.
Me: Huh? Ok...what for? (At this point I realize that he probably doesn't know what a nipple brush is).
J: Ummm....to brush your nipples during labor...I guess....
Me: TO DO WHAT?!?! Where does it say that???? A nipple brush is used for nipples on bottles!
J: Oh.....that makes more sense.

J: What smells would you like in the house while you're in labor?
Me: Umm...I don't know...there's still time to think about that. I don't know if I want any smells around here at all.
J: Should I make the house smell like garlic? You love garlic!
Me: No. Are you serious?

Me: We have to get this baby gym for her!
J: Why does she even need that?
Me: WHY DO YOU WANT OUR DAUGHTER TO BE STUPID?! (I begin to start crying, while completely aware that I sound insane).
J: It's ok...she's not going to be stupid...we will go get her that baby gym. I think you're just emotional cause you're pregnant...
Me: I AM NOT CRAZY!!!!! (I apologized a few hours later when I realized I was indeed crazy).

Lady waxing my brows: So, when are you due?
Me: Due? For what?? (Giving her a very confused look).
Lady: Ummm...(Nervous laughter & very confused look on her face).
Me: Ok...well...it's a beautiful day. Thanks and have a good day! (I get in the car and begin to drive away when I realize that she was asking about my due date).

Me: There's a little baby in my belly, so we have to remember to use gentle hands.
E: Ok. There's a baby in there?
Me: Yup...
E: Hmmm...(lifts her shirt up to check her belly)...there's no baby in my belly.
Me: No, no baby in your belly...just my belly!
E: There's crackers in my belly! I like crackers!
A few weeks later...
E: The baby gonna come out of your belly into your panties and pants!
Me: Ummmmmmmmmm.....ok.

This has been quite a fun adventure so far!

4 comments:

  1. So funny!!! Lol at the first one :)
    Stacy

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  2. I seriously giggled out loud about the nipple brush. Hilarious. We had a similar play gym moment. Only ours was a bookcase and I had a meltdown that Ryan wanted our son to NEVER learn to read.

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  3. OH my gosh! Seriously hilarious! I'm thinking of doing another blogger meet up- do you think you're up for it? I'd love to see you again!

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  4. I was cracking up out loud at all of these. The first one is the best. Good times now and many more to come. :)

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